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love is another word for series of moments

Feel it swell up inside.. the moisture can not abide the feeling that coincides. i try... to hold on to it but its overwhelming me its power is threatening.. my chest is shivering- damn its cold inside. is that where the icebox still resides? i feel so effed up but i cant lie im trying to deny that i have feelings for someone else. maybe if you werent miles away it would help. holding on to this tear drop as if its dear life, impacted or changed feelings of strife.. playin mary in my head no im not gonna cry- im so sorry ill try; yet its not that your not worth my tears.. its just that ive been through this back and forth bullshyt for years. the dry cheek is getting moist, im loosing my voice if it exposes itself what will people think? wait rewind i dont care what people think. damn i want a drink.. but the unconsciousness my brain would feel wont mask the hurt simply displace it for a few hours and in a few hours i must come up with a decision a newly written provision for us to start our lives together-

...

or apart. do you remember where it all started? the pomonok center you walked up to me open hearted. i remember being a young girl in the bathroom with you showing me your birthmark.. that little white speck on your skin so rich and dark. you had hair back then.. lol it was much longer than mine and i remember how we went upstairs and you ranted and raved how i was fine. i feel it growing bigger in me now.. insecurites take a bow cuz you have shined so brightly on my stage of love. next to you, there is no one and only God is above. under you, there are many.. i mean yes i have been talkin to plenty and no i havent given them what i have given to you.. my world my desires the completed half of my dream season II. it starts off with me being the perfect picture in a frame my mother hangs on her wall unit, and some candy painted walls. the taste is so sweet no honey; im talking about your lips. im fighten this feeling even harder simply thinking about your kiss. every day you tell me how much you miss how much i miss how much we could do this... i believe it. yet in the same time i feel like im making the biggest mistake of my life, how do i know im ment to be your wife? a decision im not ready to make for consequences im willing to take. throw me on at 360 and just let me bake.. i want to see your smile for every day that i wake....

My baby.. i cant forsake. how do i make this decision? its tearin me up inside and my heart wont cry but the guitar will, my friends are tellin me to take it a day at a time and just chill but i dont have the heart in me to cheat and i dont have the stomach to handle the beat- of murderer.. you dont deserve that and neither does he but i cant seem to format the perfect picture of we. we wasnt all that picture perfect when he came in the picture but we wasnt this close to just wither... you gave me your heart and your trusting me with it i gave you my word and we was peaches and herb and peaches and cream and in georgia south florida peach is a theme and i wish this was a dream i could wake up from.. still up at 3:24 my breath is getting numb.

i thought maybe me and him are fate, me and you are great and love will take its way.. but i was told love is another word for series of moments..